The Word for the Day is: OUCH

So in my last blog I was talking about my apprehension of taking on a 1/2 marathon so soon after my tummy tuck. Right after I blogged I wondered, "How far can I run without stopping?" So at first my goal was a half an hour (I have been able to run up to an hour straight prior to surgery) and then see how I felt. Then I went for 40 minutes and could keep going. I finally ended up running 5 miles in 50 minutes. This is not my usual pace, but again I got out of shape recovering from surgery. I did have to stop briefly 2 times due to "minor" interruptions (my kids wanted breakfast...the nerve :) ). With warm up and cool down it was a total 5.8 miles and an hour of cardio. Oh, and I did my cool down holding a 30 pound weight by the way :) (His name is Noah and he also had his blankie in his hand. He has issues too).

As if that weren't pushing myself enough, I went to the gym yesterday since my mom was here to watch my double trouble. Lately when I've tried to go to the Y, they have been politely asking me to leave since my boys love me soooo much, they won't stop crying when I leave. So I was so excited to be able to go without the minor interruptions. What's the first thing I went for? The stairmaster (and FYI MizFit, I don't hold the handle grips, I use my arms) that looks like a set of stairs. Again, at first I did 5 min. warm up..then 25 min...then another 25 min...finally a 5 minute cool down walking on it backwards. Then I did 2 sets of the weight machines, arms, legs, and back (can't do crunches yet)! Am I insane? OMG why did I over do it??? I let my ambition/stubbornness get the best of me. Needless to say, I will be doing a LOT of stretching today and perhaps soak in my tub at nap time. I will try to at least walk to loosen up my muscles.

When I talked earlier about being bad about weights, I like to do weights, it's just that I do cardio 1st and then run out of time. Now that I'm not training for a race, I don't think I need to do cardio 5-6 days a week. Or at least, I can shorten a cardio time or 2 to add weights. I get Shape magazine which is great and has great workouts, but can I be frank? They will show a picture A and picture B and give worded directions, but sometimes I still don't get it. I have to watch that exercise be performed in order to do it myself. I think they have demo exercises online that I"ll have to check out. And another shout out to Miz... watching your Monday face time weight demos are good tips too! When people at my work see my arms, they ask me what I did to get them.

As of right now, my workout consisted of lifting 2 30 lb. weights on each arm :).

I will be working on doing actual weights though. Just..not today because...O-U-C-H!!!

Oh, and I'm hurting because due to my competitive nature I was up to 2 am trying to find the answers to MizFit's scavenger hunt! Being up that late, I suddenly was HUNGRY. Not bored, actual hunger pains. I don't think I had enough protein during the day and the result was a food freak out. I don't freak out often, but when I do it's quite impressive. My TOM probably didn't help either, but next time I need to hide my kids' box of Cheez It's is all I can say!

Early Morning Ramblings

So I went to go to a Friday Weight Watchers meeting, rather than today due to family outings. When I walked in, I was getting "the look" from several ladies. "Hello can I help you? You're a member here?" What look may you be asking? I only know this look because it was the EXACT same look I used to give women 3 years ago. It's the "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SKINNY BITCH DOING AT WEIGHT WATCHERS?!?" You know that look. Do I think I'm a skinny bitch, no, but do I think some are looking at me with disdain in their eyes YES. Even when I go to my regular meetings, I get that look. I finally made a scrapbook page of my before and after pics to bring so that people realize I'm not at Weight Watchers to make people feel bad. I'm there because I need to be there. I was overweight and would like not to go back to that so I go to be kept on track. Why do we women do that? I used to do it when I was bigger and my friends lost weight and now I see my friends doing it to me. It's almost as if we're irritated by someone making a choice to better their life. Why can't we be happy for each other?

Anyway, since weight loss is not so much my goal anymore (except for the 7 lbs. I've gained since my surgery that hasn't gone away) but maintaining my weight is, I need to have a goal in my mind to give myself a Woot Woot since I don't get them at my Weight Watcher meetings anymore. So I was thinking I would train for a 1/2 Marathon. I found one in December in Vegas that I thought would give me enough time to train. After talking to my sister-in-law though (she did Ironman this summer and is AMAZING), she wasn't too happy about that race. She told me about local 1/2's that would be in October. At first I was really excited. I went to several running websites and printed out their training schedules and now I'm freaked out. I think October is realistically too soon for me. I still can't run 5 miles without stopping a few times. I also have to wear my binder still (like a giant ace bandage) around my abs when I run still or I have severe pain. Plus, the school year will start back up soon and I am usually frazzled the first month. So, I'm disappointed in myself that I feel like I'm making excuses, but I'm trying to keep it real. My husband suggests I start really training in January so I don't push myself too much. If I'm going to do a 1/2 I'd have to start training yesterday. *Sigh* So for now, I think I might have the goal of the 100 push up challenge (can't do the ab challenge since I'm not allowed to do them for another month). Anyone else have any other suggestions for me? I'm great at doing cardio with running or dragging my 2 monkeys in the bike trailer, but I'm horrible about weight training.

Issue #2

I have a membership to a gym. I go to use the equipment in peace and quiet (otherwise I have 2 toddlers bugging me every minute). I don't go as much as I'd like and when I don't go I workout at home on my treadmill, run on local trails, or ride my bike. Now here's my issue. Why is it when the machine asks for my height, weight, and age it seems like it should be somewhat accurate when it reality...it's NOT. When I workout on an elliptical I find I'm hardly winded and I don't sweat. I have to crank the resistance up to almost it's highest level for me to feel anything and when it's like that I feel like I'm trying to walk through quicksand. When I do a half an hour on this type of machine, it says I've burned 500 calories. Now to me, a normal person would think they just burned 500 calories and could go ahead and eat 2 cookies for dessert since they've 'worked it off.' The elliptical I work out on looks similar to this one:

I get similar results when I workout on an Arc Trainer. At least when I exercise on this I feel winded and sweaty. I doubt it's acuracy also since one day it said I burned 1,000 calories in an hour.

The most difficult machine for me is the stair climber. I immediately start sweating and breathing heavily when I'm on this. Yet, in the same half an hour it says I've burned 300 calories. I just dripped sweat all over this machine and that's what I get???

Also at home when I run, I sweat and could not talk to you if I tried. In about a half hour time, I would get maybe 400 caloires calculated on this machine.

Now what's the deal??? Why when I work my butt off the machine shows the lowest calories?!? That's why I don't trust these machines. I use my WW activity points calculator and track my miles. It's just irritating that some people may take those calories on the machines at face value and that may derail their workout progress.

Vacation Goals Reviewed

First, I want to thank every one for the positive comments and feedback. You all are great and give me such strength and motivation. So I'm back from my trip and did the dreaded walk to my scale. I slowly placed my feet onto the scale, holding onto my windowsill for extra lightness :). I look down...and I'm up 2.6 lbs. Am I upset about this? NO! I'm actually proud, since I usually use my 35 points on the weekends, this is a typical weigh in on a Monday. How do I do on each goal?

*Pack portioned out snacks- Achieved with pretzels, apples, Clif bars, WW string cheese, and granola bars

*Bring own breakfast foods to avoid the continental breakfast waffles and pastries- Basically achieved...I didn't eat any pastries. What I bought for 2 breakfasts were fresh fruit, granola, and yogurt from Whole Foods.

*Walk as many places as possible- Achieved 7.6 miles minimum

*Bring workout clothes and shoes to use the gym at the hotel- Failed..too tired from walking everywhere

*Take advantage of fresh fish in Seattle- Achieved w/ baked Halibut

*Bring my Dining Out Companion book for just in case circumstances- Achieved, didn't have any of the restaurants we went to, but I did bring it

*Enjoy my vacation...not worry totally about food but also not go crazy- Achieved (my husband was relived I wasn't my normal obsessive self)

*Try to feel sexy for myself and my husband- Achieved (See my attempt in the photo)...skinny girls do NOT understand how lucky they are to be able to wear normal underwear. I have worn undies that reach my breasts for the last 7 years! I had a hay day shopping for a different outfit each night from Victoria Secret!

Overall it was a great trip. I believe in everything in moderation. My one regret was drinking a bit too much wine. When I have wine, all of my filters turn off. Especially when it comes to food. The minute I have a drink I want to order and eat EVERYTHING!!! But again, everything in moderation. I'm glad I have realized this about myself.

Going on a Vacation

So it's going to be my hubby's and my 12th anniversary. We are going to Seattle for a long weekend. Usually when I travel with my husband, he's all about cheap and drive thru's so I need a plan. Hopefully, he'll be a little bit better since he has recently lost about 35 lbs. Here's my plan to stay strong:

*Pack portioned out snacks
*Bring own breakfast foods to avoid the continental breakfast waffles and pastries
*Walk as many places as possible
*Bring workout clothes and shoes to use the gym at the hotel
*Take advantage of fresh fish in Seattle
*Bring my Dining Out Companion book for just in case circumstances
*Enjoy my vacation...not worry totally about food but also not go crazy
*Try to feel sexy for myself and my husband

This should work! Wish me luck!

Perfection is in the Eye of the Beholder

So some of you might be wondering why I have my issues. "Why is she complaining when she's already lost her weight?" Most people thought when I lost my weight I was "perfect." (as stated in a previous post) Well my friends, I have a secret. You know my after picture on the right. The pink shirt I'm wearing, I used to hide something under there. Here is my disclaimer:

**If you have recently eaten or have a weak stomach, do not read the rest of this post or scroll down. Pictures may be offensive to some, so please beware. Just stop reading and I'll see you another time.**

OK, so for my deep, dark secret. I think some of my mental dysfunction and distorted body image had to do with what I used to hide under that pink shirt. If you wish to know, here it is:

What is that hideous looking thing you ask? That was my stomach up to 6 weeks ago. You might be wondering...OMG is that what my stomach will look like after I get to my goal weight? Not necessarily. And even if it does, I would take my wrinkly, Shar Pei looking belly over all of the ailments I had being obese. Let me list them off:

*Sleep apnea
*Acid reflux
*Bad knees
*Asthma

*Infertility
*Prediabetic

I won't even list off all of the other known health benefits to losing weight. But, I've had people at my Weight Watchers meetings ask me about after losing weight didn't I get loose skin. Almost like they wanted to use that as an excuse to NOT do the program. Let me show you all a new picture that might explain my stomach that didn't necessarily have to do with typical weight loss.

You see, I had twins that were 5 lb. 13 oz. and 6 lb. 5 oz. And they were straight out. So, I mostly blame my darling babies for my belly. So when I used to look down at my body, I would see that skin and think I was still fat. I did make the decision to have a tummy tuck 6 weeks ago. I am very happy with my decision. My husband and I were afraid my brain was going to the bad place (eating disorder) because I thought I was still fat even though I was on the bottom of my weight watcher scale. So as you can see, perfection is in the eye of the beholder. You may not be perfect when you achieve your weight loss goal like myself. But please don't let the idea of maybe having loose skin deter your weight loss efforts. I could hide or get rid of my loose skin. It was hard to hide my 74 pounds of fat! Oh and I forgot, here are my after pictures.

6 weeks after surgery:

As you can see, still not perfect since I have stretch marks on top of stretch marks. Did the surgery hurt? Not that much. I have had 2 previous c-sections which may have helped. Plus, my doc is trying this new electronic patch that you wear to alieveate the muscles spasms. Honestly, the most painful part was my back from sleeping on it and walking hunched over and my tush from sitting on it so much. Even though it's not perfect, I feel SOOOOO much better about myself and not have to tuck it into underwear and my clothes.

PB2 & BBQ

A few questions about the PB2. It's ground into a powder and then pressed which takes the fat out. You mix 2 tbsp of the PB2 with 1 tbsp water for 1 point. You can do a TON with it.

*Low cal/points PB&J (could be as low as 2 points)

*Sprinkle in with WW Smoothie chocolate smoothie mix for a 2 point chocolate/peanut butter smoothie

*Sprinkle some in with your stir fried veggies for a great peanut sauce

*Some of you mix peanut butter with your steel cut oatmeal, this could be an alternative.

Also, if you don't like all of the sugar in BBQ sauce, as I mentioned in the earlier post, I read a Weight Watcher recipe that simply had you mix 1 cup ketchup with a can of diet cola (I prefer Coke 0). What I do with it:

*Slowly stir 1 can of diet coke into a bowl with a cup of ketchup
*Pour into a saute pan with 4 chicken breasts
*Bring sauce to a boil
*Boil breasts for 10 minutes on each side
*Reduce heat to low and remove chicken breasts
*Use to forks to pull the chicken apart
*Place shredded chicken back into the pan
*Cook on low/med heat for 10 more minutes

You can serve on low cal buns for a nice summer BBQ chicken sandwich. If you don't do bread, I place 4 oz. over a microwaveable baked potato.

Just some things I do. If you haven't been able to tell by now, I'm not a great cook. I need fast, convenient, and healthy.