Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Attention All Athletes

So since my Saturday night out with old friends, I have been going forward with my HM training. I ran 36 miles last week! Also, I did week 4 of the pushup challenge, but I need to do it again. It was the first week where I could barely finish the sets. So, since my last blog I hit a major milestone in my life. I ran my first 10 miles on Saturday! I ran it in an hour and a half. It felt like a huge accomplishment! But since I have been running 8 or more miles the last couple of weeks, my knees are starting to hurt! I have had to ice them nightly. When I'm at work, they are cracking all the time. My knees haven't acted up in years, so I'm surprised at the sudden pain I'm feeling. My race is in less than 2 weeks though, so unless I drop dead or have to have crutches, I WILL run this race. I heard I might need to replace my shoes again. I'll try it and see. I don't think I've run 500 miles yet, and my dear old hubs thinks it's BS. He said to me, "Cars weigh 2 tons and they don't need a tire change for 30,000 miles. How can you have worn out your shoes that you just bought in May?" He held them up to me and said they look brand new and he sees no holes so what's the problem? My hubs is sweet but a bit of a cheap skate. I've been trying to stretch and massage my legs to see if it helps. I've read ice baths help but that sounds H-O-R-R-I-D. Any other thoughts?

Also, I have been reading more about running and found out I better buy a running belt or handheld bottle with some Gatorade type fluids in it so I don't "hit the wall." I usually don't like to drink water while I run because I easily get side aches. When I went to my local running store this weekend, he told me I definitely NEED to be drinking and it could be what I eat before I run that gives me side cramps. So, since up until now my runs have been under an hour, I wasn't eating at all. Lately, I've been eating a Luna Nutrition for Women bar an hour before I run. I need advice. What do you runners eat before a race and how many hours prior to you eat it? I have one health condition that did not go away losing weight and that's the very embarrassing IBS. So many times when I run, I not only get pain in my side, but it jumps up to around my collar bone area and hurts enough to slow me down. I don't want to run out of energy, but I also don't want to wake up at 4 am so my body can digest my food before my 10:30 race. So..advice..eating tips...time tips...knee tips??? I'll take anything peeps. And even you nonrunners but peeps who workout...what do you eat before exercise? Thanks all!

Monday, September 22, 2008

I Could Get Used to This

On Saturday night, the hubs and I met up with a lot of old high school friends for a karaoke party. Many people I haven't seen in a few to up to 10 years. I feel almost guilty or conceded for these thoughts but...I can't tell you how great it felt to hear peoples reactions when they saw me. Mouths dropped to the ground...speechlessness...saying some inappropriate words. I saw one old friend who was one of many girls I went to high school with who could eat anything and everything she wanted and couldn't gain weight. Well we are in our 30's now and her metabolism has slowed down a bit. She yelled at me and told me I was making the rest of them look bad.

I've never been in this place before. The place of being smaller than all of my girl friends. None of them ever had a weight problem. None of them understood what it was like for me to watch them eat donuts for breakfast, candy on our breaks, pizza and fries for lunch or dinner and be stick thin. I would be sad and embarrassed to go shopping with them. I hated how they could all trade clothes with each other but not me. I hated being the fattest bridesmaid in ALL of their weddings. They were used to me like this. I was used to me like this. My friend who yelled at me last night yelled at me back in the day. "If you want to lose weight, lose weight. Get over it. It's not that hard. Look at me. I hate being called skinny. It's just as bad as me calling you fat." My best friend would blow a gasket if someone guessed her weight to be 125. "125, I'm not fat," would be her response. I remember thinking that was the weight I would tell people I weighed when I really weighed 140. If she thought 125 was fat, what did she really think of me?

So last night, it was interesting to watch them. They were turning into the old me. They'd look at me, then look down and their tummies and start grabbing and pulling at places. I frequently heard the words, "Whatever," "Shut up" "Oh my god." I finally got a bit irritated and told them to be nice. I was always the big girl. I've worked my ass of literally. Can't you just be happy for me? I'm not doing anything to purposely make you feel bad about yourself, I'm just trying to learn and live a healthy life. Why do most of us compare ourselves to others? It's a horrible, vicious cycle we do to ourselves.

I do understand though because that's how I used to be. Just being around those skinny girls made me feel bad about myself. Again, they weren't doing anything to me, but it felt like a conspiracy. That all these girls had a trick or knew a secret and wouldn't share it with me. They were all in their thin club, humoring me because I was the funny fat girl. None of them worked for their young bodies before. They didn't watch what they ate. They definitely didn't work out, though a few did some sports. But they are doing the same things now as they did then but they're getting different results. They find it insane that I run. They've never even heard of 5 or 10K's. I hope they all will go through the learning process that I had to. I feel good that I'm small because I worked for it. I was not given a naturally thin body. I have to work everyday. Those girls never had to do it before and are having a hard time doing it now. The best compliment I heard of the night was my own hubs saying to me, "You know you were the hottest girl there tonight right?" I could get used to this :).

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Race Recap- 2nd Place Female

For this race, I was surprised at the disorganization of the whole thing. First, I went to register online like I always do. Paypal got my payment amazingly enough, but not my age, sex, or race I was doing. Then, I almost didn't go in on Friday to register since they said they were only registering until 4:30. Luckily I called and they told me it was a typo and that I could come until 6. When I went to register, I had already emailed someone with my info that paypal lost, but yet AGAIN they didn't have my info just my moolah. They did give me a goodie bag that was a green reusable grocery bag, some YMCA pamphlets, chap stick, a Bumble Bar (which tasted and looked like birdseed), chapstick, a vitamin water, and a t-shirt. Their were two races simultaneously, a 5K and a 10K. The trail the race was on is open to the public, so we all had to crowd on the sides to let bicyclists and other walker/runners not involved in the race (hence my problem last weekend) through. Once the race started, I watched about 15 guys and 1 chick go sprinting like they were on fire or something. They were not fooling around. I'm used to this trail and it only has gentle inclines and declines. It was perfect weather, overcast but about 60 degrees. Since this race was 3.1 miles in and then you turn around, I knew what place I was in for the females...2nd! The first place girl smoked me probably by 5 or 10 minutes. I was proud of myself though because no one passed me and I passed 2 men! Two dudes!!! That's never happened in the middle or end of a race before, but it did this time! When the race was over, I had a woman and a couple tell me my pink shorts were their focus point. "We kept trying to catch you, but you had a really good pace." The bummer at the end was, I forgot my husbands watch, I don't have a fancy running watch yet (any suggestions for me to ask for at Christmas??), and they weren't timing us! They said to me, "This wasn't a timed event, but would you like it to be next year?" Umm let me see...YYEESSSS! I hate when I don't know my time. The 4th place gal had a clock on and hers was stopped at 48:00 so I assume I did it in 47:00 which is a PR for me! No pics of me either except a few my mama took of me before the race. I'll have to post them when she downloads her camera. Knowing my mom though, that could be in 6 months!!! Anyway, I felt good about my race again and am feeling more and more confident that I'll be ready for my HM in October!

Friday, September 19, 2008

Weekly Workouts

So tomorrow I have another race in my HM training schedule. It's another small race (in numbers I mean). A 10K this time. It's on the same trail the ALS walkers were on, but it sounds like this race is much smaller. I'm surprised because it too is a worthy cause, it's a race to fight hunger. It starts at 9:00 and then there are a ton of festivities I'm going to take my kiddos to. I have to take grandma with me because it's a 2 person job whenever I try to take my darling duo out in public. They will have pony rides, a petting zoo, bouncy castles, and a fishing pond (with real fish). It should be a chaotic kind of fun. Here are my workouts for the week:

Monday- Ran 3 miles, 2 X 2:00 AI, 2 X 2:30 AI, 1 x 3:00 AI + 6 gentle pickups for a total of 5.7 miles
Tuesday- Rest
Wednesday- 1 mile uphill, 1 mile with 2 GP, repeat 2 more times for a total of 6.1 miles
Thursday- Week 3 day 3 push up challenge 30, 22,22, 20, 35 that's 124 push ups!!!
Friday- 4.5 miles in 43 minutes

I'll post my race results over the weekend. Wish me luck!

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Feeling More "Normal" One Day at a Time

Ack I don't know how you folks do it keeping up with posts, commenting, etc. plus work and kids. Anyhoo, my 8 miler on Saturday was interesting to say the least. I run on a paved trail used by many walkers, bicyclists, roller-bladers, runners, etc. In fact, it goes from one city in my state to a neighboring city in another state...over 30 miles just one way. As I started on the trail, I saw tons of signs saying, "Caution Walkers Ahead." There were also signs of encouragement from business owners and family members. As I was going in for my first 4 miles, it was busy but no major walking event that I could see. As I was coming back for my 2nd 4 miles, I was coming down from a slight hill and there I saw them. Herds of them. Hundreds of them. Walkers all just starting their walk in the same direction I was headed. They were walking to raise money and awareness for ALS. I thought it was great because I wasn't sure what ALS was so I made sure to look it up when I got home. It's Lou Gerigh's disease and it sounds horrible. A very worthy casue. But, I wasn't sure what to do since they were taking up the entire width of the trail. I didn't know if I should just run on the streets, walk behind them, or try to pass them. I did the later of the three. I was running in gravel, through bushes, under tree branches, past dogs, etc. I felt like I couldn't stop my run because I'm building endurance. This crowd came around my 6 mile marker. It took me most of the 7th mile to pass all of them, which I did. The last mile was easy sailing. I was proud that I still ran my 8 miles in 70 minutes considering the wall of people I had to move around.

I have been noticing that I am receiving compliments easier than I used to. I'm not sure if I thought I'd be conceded taking compliments or what but I mostly think I just didn't agree with their assessment. One day in particular, I had a new outfit on that the hubs and I disagreed about. I thought it was cute and he thought it was just alright. Almost all of my staff and several parents commented on the outfit (which to me proves that I have better taste than the hubs :)). But, I simply said, "Thank you," to each and every compliment. Not, "Well I used to be almost 200 lbs," or "Well you should have seen me before, " or "I'm not skinny. You're high," like I normally did. I also am finally seeing a sort of smallness to my body. When I was sitting in a meeting with other parents, for some reason I was looking at the width of my legs and hips compared to others around me. I did notice I was smaller than many of them. I'm also not doubling taking as much to my own reflection as I used to. I really am trying to "fake it til I make it" with my body image. Plus, it always makes me feel better when the scale is showing my hard work. I have been adding a lot of HIT's to my runs and it's showing on the scale. That lil bugger hadn't moved in awhile, but it's finally starting to get back to normal. I am evolving I tell you. Who would I be if I wasn't the fat, cynical, self-deprecated, class clown girl? I didn't know, but I'm starting to find out.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

"How Did You Stay With It?"

This is the new reoccurring question I keep getting. How did you STAY at weight watchers, how did you STAY motivated, how did you STAY on track? Often, I have people ask me how I lost my weight. I tell them Weight Watchers. Then I might hear a comment like, "Well I do Weight Watchers and I haven't lost any weight," or "I go for about a week, lose 5 lbs. and then I'm over it." These comments are always perplexing to me. I think the difference might be beyond motivation or will power. I think it's about your mind set. I had tried other diets before and had little success. I jumped on the Oprah diet bandwagon. I bought all of Dr. Phil's weight loss books. Even had a short love affair with Phen Fen. The problem was, I had a DIET mind set while on these. My thoughts would be, "How fast can I lose this weight," and "I can't wait until I lose weight so I can eat bread again," etc. This type of mind set will lead to failure ever time. I think the people who say they're on weight watchers and can't loose weight have a diet mind set. A quick fix mentality if you will.

I am a very goal oriented person. I needs goals in my life. When I joined weight watchers, I had a goal. My goal was to get to a healthy weight to no longer be prediabetic AND to be able to get pregnant. My sister-in-law had joined WW and lost 50 lbs. so I saw that it worked. Once I walked into my 1st WW meeting I was hooked. I did everything they told me. I figured out my points, wrote EVERYTHING I ate down, drank my water, made sure I was getting my fruits, dairy, and veggies. Well, I guess I shouldn't say everything, because they want you to get 2 tsp. of healthy oils daily, and I do have a problem getting that in. Anyway, I was on a mission and kept going until I accomplished my goal. There was never, "Maybe I'll get to goal or I might get to goal." It was always, "When I get to goal or I have to get to goal." I wasn't in it for a quick fix. I was in it to change my life. My mind set was on a LIFE STYLE change rather than on a diet.

After I had stopped nursing my darling duo, I knew I couldn't wait to get back to WW. I hear of people stopping and starting WW many times, of people getting to goal weight, leaving the program, and then coming back because they gained their weight back. I have not been one of those people. I have joined, committed to changing my life, and have stayed. WW is not just about tracking food, they encourage daily physical activity and different mind set tools. The mind set tools are what I will continue to work on since I have not yet conquered my thoughts yet.

So how did I stay? There was never any other option for me. If I didn't, I would have type 2 diabetes by now, continue to have acid reflux and be medicated daily, continue having to wear my darth vader mask at bed due to sleep apnea, puff on my inhaler daily, and probably just be the mother of one rather than 3. Not staying was never an option in my mind. I wasn't wishy-washy, I wasn't just going with the flow. I make a conscious effort every day to make positive changes for myself. I don't see doing it any other way now.

On the exercise front, here's how my week and HM training went:
Monday- Pilates bun and thighs, Week 3 Day 1 push up challenge: 25, 17, 17, 15, 25
Tuesday- Ran 3 miles, did 2:00, 2:30, 2:30 sprints, 2 miles for a total of 6.25 miles
Wednesday- Day 2 push up challenge 27, 19, 19, 15, 30
Thursday- Ran w/ 4 1:30 sprints and 6 gp for a total of 6 miles
Friday- Ran 4.5 miles
Saturday- Changing my long runs from Sundays to today, so I'm off to run 8 miles!

Monday, September 8, 2008

Pros and Cons of Running Outdoors

Thanks for all my props on the race. When I said it was small I mean it was SMALL. We didn't have race numbers, just stickers they asked us to wear on our shirts. I happened to lose mine without even realizing it until they asked for it at the finish line. There were no pictures taken and most of the people there were students, parents, or teachers at a private school who started this race as a fundraiser for the athletic department. But hey, it's probably the best place I'll ever get so I'm basking in my glory! Anyhoo, on Sunday my race training called for a 4-5 mile run after racing. I thought my legs or knee might hurt, which they did, but oddly enough running made them feel better! What's up with that??? I started my run around my neighborhood since I wasn't sure my knee was up for running. I have mapped out several routes around where I live so I thought I could estimate 5 miles. I don't have a fancy running watch yet. So I left my house at 10:05 and ran back into my kitchen at 11:00. Ack!!! I was confused. How did I run 5 miles in 55 minutes? My pace is usually faster than 10:00 min. miles. So what did I do with my compulsive self, I drove my route to measure it. What I thought was 5 miles was actually 6.1 so I was a bit happier with my pace. The good news for me was that I actually felt good the whole race. Many times when I run, I get tummy aches or shooting pains in my collar bone area. Not yesterday. I felt like I could have kept going, but I had a party to get to. Speaking of the party, no cake or ice cream, but I did have a few handfuls of chips. Pretty successful for me since normally if I eat one chip, I standing by and devour the whole bowl the rest of the function.

Well, while I was running I was making a list of pros and cons for running outside vs. my treadmill. So here is what I came up with:

Pros- Seeing the colors of nature...the green grass...beautiful flowers...live trees..crystal clear water.
Cons- The smells of cut grass kills me...seasonal allergies plus I have a thing with smells when I exercise.

Pros- Seeing different animals in their habitats...geese flying over head...a squirrel trying to catch a nut...baby bunnies running for cover.
Cons- Dogs not on their leashes that I'm afraid will chase after me and bite me in the ass!

Pros- The variety of views I get to see instead of my basement walls
Cons- Roadkill!

Pros- The view of the beautiful weather
Cons- Getting nailed in the face, arms, and legs with bugs of various sizes

Pros- It's more challenging running on streets for me than my treadmill
Cons- I feel nervous and eyeball any man in my near vicinity ready to gouge out an eyeball if need be

Biggest Pro- Time flies when I'm running outdoors!
Biggest Con- Not having a bathroom 20 feet away!

How about it runners? Have anymore to add to the list?

Saturday, September 6, 2008

First Place Female

Boy starting school has been hectic and therefore I'm behind on my writing and reading blogs. Here's what's been happening this week. The most exciting news is that I ran a 5K today and won 1st place of all the females. It was a very small race, but there were a ton of young girls that I thought would smoke me. I finished in 26.15.27. The top overall finisher finished in 16 minutes! Are you kidding me??? That's never gonna happen here, but I'm proud of my time. Especially since the last mile was all uphill. And this is not some little low grade hill...I'm guessing this hill was at least a 7% incline and it was windy. My left knee hurts a bit either from:
A) Running down hill in a mowed wheat field.
B) Having to jump over a ditch going downhill.
C) Running up the switchbacks.

I went to my gym afterwards and soaked in the hot tub for a bit and then in the cold pool. It seems better and I hope so since I'm only at the end of week 3 in training and I can't afford any days off.

I was very frustrated that a dude who I saw stop to walk at least 3 times still beat me. I just couldn't catch him on that hill, but I did NOT stop to walk once!!! Yeah for me!!!

Let's see what else, oh , I want to add another goal for myself for September. I have an extremely hard time taking a compliment. Someone will compliment me and I somehow turn around and give myself a put down rather than take it, so my goal is to just say, "Thank you," to a compliment.

Also, I joined the Bad Boys vs. Bad Girls of Running challenge. The girls are behind so please check it out if you're getting miles in for workouts.

Wednesday- Bun & Thigh Pilates, week 2 day 2 push up challenge: 16, 13, 11, 11, 25, 2 sets of the following w/ 8 lb. weights: overhead press, bicep curls, tricep extensions, hammer curls, & bend over row.
Thursday- Run 4 miles including 5 1:00 sprints and 4 gentle pickups for 4.65 total
Friday- rest for race
Saturday- 5k Top Female Finisher WooHooo!!!!

Tomorrow I plan on a 5 mile run depending on how my knee and butt feels after today. I also have my best friends son's birthday party to go to. Maybe I can eat a small sliver of cake since I'm going to run in the am. Ya think? We'll see! My actual challenge isn't the cake usually, it's the chips that are around. I wonder if I'll ever think like a normal person when I go to functions. Most people are thankful that they don't have to cook and are getting a free meal. When I hear about buffets or free meals I panic since I'm not eating things that I'm controlling OR more importantly, I don't know the exact points on. I'm fine for indulging once and awhile, but I want to know the point value. I freak out if I don't know. Will I ever be over that? Will I ever not still be the fat girl inside? Things to ponder. For now I will just bask in my glory. Oh by the way, thank you all for recommending Body Glide for my problem. I actually have discovered I already have a product that works a bit the same. I use Aquaphor on my tummy tuck scar. It's a healing ointment and it has a vaseline type consistency and it's been great. I haven't bled at all even though it's still a newer wound.

How about any of you that struggle now or have struggled with weight in the past? Do you all get twitchy and nervous around open eating situations? Or is it just me?

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Issue #3 My Body Image

So if you haven't noticed by now, I have a poor body image. I have always had it but thought it would magically go away once I lost my weight. But here it is staring me in the face and mirror everyday. I was reading my Shape magazine tonight and found a little blurb that fits me to a T. The author suggested that when you wake up and look in the mirror, instead of focusing on your flaws (ahem moi), tell yourself, "Hi beautiful," instead. The author said that when you constantly put yourself down it's a self fulfilling prophecy. You have to break the pattern of bashing into appreciating. This comes from the book Life Doesn't Begin 5 Pounds From Now by Jess Weiner. This sounds like a book I may need to read. Also, I've heard to stare at your body and find things about it you LIKE. OK so here goes...I like my calves. They are muscular and have no cellulite.

More positivity...I made it through my first day of school with my 2nd graders. A chatty but sweet bunch. My oldest son is also in 2nd grade at my school, but he's not in my classroom. Here we are before leaving the house:

Also, reflecting on August Goals here's how I did:

#1 Back to running at least 4 times a week- Accomplished

#2 Go to the Y for Stair Master and Weights at least 4 times a week- Work in progress

#3 Exercise for a total of 100 miles- Accomplished with 118.5 total miles!!!

September Goals-
#1 Continue my 1/2 marathon training

#2 Continue the 100 push-up challenge

#3 Cross train on rest days

Exercise over the weekend:

Saturday- 4 mile run + 8 mile hike with hubby up 1100 feet in elevation! We started at the base of the lake and climbed up to see this view:

Sunday- Long run of 7 miles
Monday- Week 2, day 1 of push up challenge: 12, 12, 9, 7, 25
Tuesday- Ran 2 miles, 1:00, 1:30, & 2:00 sprints, end with 2 miles for 5.65 total miles
Oh and something new has happened to me. I have heard of athletes chaffing after working out. I recently have done that under my tribal boobs. It's like I caused a blister. When I took off my shirt after my long run, you could see blood on my bra. When I lifted it up (you know about the tribal boobs right), it was rubbed raw. It hurt like a motha in the shower. So you exercise folks, this happen to any of you? What do you do to avoid/heal chaffing? I've heard it can happen on the back too.